Tips and Tricks for Your Chopped Boyfriend (It Is a Joke)

The four steps, kept exactly as they were

1. Create a checklist. Focus on ticking the non physical criteria. All of them, ideally.

2. Improve his style. A visit to Uniqlo or COS, courtesy of some married friends' advice.

3. Just pray every day. That God gives your boyfriend favour in your eyes, because he is so chopped.

4. Preach your beliefs. Make a post about how chopped your boyfriend is. This is the important one.

Step four is the punchline, and it is also the thing the whole post is making fun of.

Why this one went off

It landed 17,000 likes, our biggest of that week, and the comments were split exactly where you would expect.

The word carries the post. Chopped is doing the same job that suay or blur does in a local sentence, where explaining it out loud ruins it. Everybody under 30 in Singapore knew what the caption meant before slide one.

It works because the format is a straight faced listicle. Same slides, same fonts, same tips-and-tricks structure as a real guide, applied to something that should never be a guide.

The follow up we promised

The last slide says follow us to learn how to write a ChatGPT ahh apology. That one is still coming, and no, we are not going to be helpful about it either.